Spam

I hate spam and junk mail, but sometimes it makes you laugh on how BAD it is. The solicitations for business, even if it's legit, is this someone I want to send money to? (Slightly editted to remove pure junk and sentences split up cause it amuses me. Nothing deleted)

Enjoy!

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Via eBay: Question for eBay Trading Assistant

Dear toddsvec,We are Chinese wholesale dealers.

If you have no good source but become sad.We can help you, please collect us, we can be long-term to provide you with low price, bringing you larger success.

We have a great deal of goods, the need is big of long-term of cooperation colleague.

Our wholesale category contain 4000.

The sample order.

Have great capacity can there is big special discount.

Please contact us.

The good opportunity isn't every day to have, we believe you will try.

The cooperation is a delectation.

The following is we the contact method of the integrity: Website:www.XXXXXX.com MSN:XXXXX@hotmail.com

The following is the space of the free order shoe: www.XXXXX.whatever

best wishes your sincerely

Thank you, www.ZZZZZ.com

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I mean really. The free order shoe? You had me 'til the free order shoe.

I just might screw with them.....

"Holy crap, really? Free shoes? That's certaily a delectation!!!!!! Can you bring me larger success if I do small of short-term coopertion quasi-banana?

Anxious a bently.

Sam Sneed, Keystone connosewer."